Happiness hit her, like a train on a track.

I just came across this picture, and wanted to share it with you guys before I sleep because it could not be truer.

Throughout my life I’ve had good and bad times just like all of you, but in all of those ‘near-perfect’ times, the scale of my happiness did not even compare to my happiness now. In that ‘now’ state, there are many things going on in my life that people would call ‘problems’, but I smile whilst facing them rather than letting them tear me up. That’s what I’d call true happiness.

Now, go dream of smiley people dancing in the rain...
Courtney’s Imagination★

Get happy.

Today, I thought I lost some strength. Fact is, I probably gained some, if anything.

I am more than happy to admit that often in life we are gonna struggle, but sometimes, those struggles can get repetitive. I still stand by the saying ‘Life is what you make it.’ but I do understand that sometimes it isn’t that easy.

For example, today I woke up in one of the worst moods possible for no reason at all, and wanted to shut the world out. Instead, I got out of bed and made it so I didn’t get back in, I got dressed, I put on my most meaningful necklace, then looked in the mirror and said to myself; “Let’s do this.’ However many times I have preached the phrase ‘say what you need to say’, it doesn’t end there. I have found that we also have to do what we need to do. Therefore, today I made an effort to be a friend in this world, rather than hate it. In reality if I'd of given in to my instincts today, I would’ve only been hurting myself.

That’s something we often don’t realise too. Most time in our lives when we are stressed out, or upset, or angry, we are the only ones that we are affected by feeling those negative emotions. There are so many times I have told my mum to chill out, or calm down to help herself, but I guess people can be so caught up in the moment that they miss the reality of the situation. Though, that's also like the situation of focussing on the bad parts of your life for so long that you miss the good ones, and the opportunities. Open your mind, and your heart.

Next time you’re feeling something negative, think about who it’s hurting, or affecting. Often, it will only be you. That’s why I believe it’s easier to be calm in crappy siutations, because you think more rationally, and find that the situation can be sorted easier than you first thought, or maybe even that it’s not actually as bad as you first thought.

If all else fails at giving you a smile, music never fails.

You’ve got the power, remember. You control your life.
Courtney’s Imagination★

Happiness is not a crime.

When I first decided to start writing this blog, I thought it’d be easy. I knew the things I wanted to be writing, knew the people I wanted to see it, and I knew what I wanted it to achieve for myself. As more and more people have been introduced to the things I write however, it’s become more difficult. I guess I was just like everyone else in my life, not understanding how much it actually meant to me.

A few days ago it hit me, that despite the fact a lot of you guys don’t know who I am, there’s also a lot of you who do. The more I share on here, the more chance there is that my loved ones who know nothing, will begin to discover who I really am. Don’t get me wrong, I want them to know, but I don’t want them to see the pain they had no idea I went through, and the things they had no idea I felt. Maybe one day I will gain the courage to tell them, or even send them a link so they can see my heart and soul spread bare onto a screen. For now, I’m pleased I can share it with you. Yes, you right there.

Moving on to a more positive note, I have been feeling amazing. January is a tough month for me with all the dates and memories it holds, but I am so pleased to be able to say that I have felt like I have spent the past week or so on top of the world. I am so content with myself, with my mind, with my actions, and with the great big smile on my face. Have you ever wondered what people think about you when you sit in a crowded room with the cheesiest grin ever? Me too, in the past. I don’t care now. I am happy, end of.

It’s not a crime to take a trip and stumble due to your mistakes. It’s a crime to not pick yourself up after you fall.

One day I will tell you more of my secrets. Until then, focus on yourself, and smile.

Happy to be me...

Courtney’s Imagination★

Bring it on, 2012.

So, many people believe that 2012 will bring us 'the end of the world', but I believe that this year will bring me the beginning of the rest of my life. I have come so far already this year and I am looking forward to seeing the things I can achieve, not only in the next few months, but in every day for the rest of my life.

If you know me well, then you will know that for several years of my life I felt like I was living in two lives. I had my life which I kept bottled away from most people, and I had the life that everybody saw daily. Over the past few years I've worked hard to change myself and my life, and I overwhelm myself with the journey I have walked so far. Behind me, are a million footsteps that hold sadness, happiness and memories. In front of me is a blank space, ready for me to lay down and walk along whichever path I will choose to make for myself, with every memory I will choose to make for myself.

2012 will be my year of honesty.

I'm excited about what the future will bring me.

Maybe you could share parts of my journey with me... If you're lucky.

Signing off from your first instalment of what's in...

Courtney's Imagination★